Wednesday, January 13, 2010
~ 2:14 AM ~
12 Jan... its always a date that i'll think bout somethings since 7 yrs ago... lol. as i look back i always lol bout our silliness then. but it always makes me treasure wad i have now. and of coz i'm thankful that eventually we became better than before.
12 Jan easy to remember lol 1 mth before 12 Feb =P I remember thinking 7yrs ago tt its a 1 mth early bad bday 'present' for me... today... somehow i felt its another mark that i'll remember... lol. can just hear them saying "Hong Jin brain is use to remember all these bo liao stuff". oh well... lol. just in case 1 day i'll forget all... now i remember while i can lor.
hmm.. i really think if something is meant to be it will be. 7 yrs ago. then little things like some of my things that just seems to come back to me when it goes missing. eg. a card holder that went missing for 4-5times once even in Sentosa and only returned after bout 2 weeks, my dear htc touch 3g that always tends to be left behind for countless times =X, my dear handphone pouch... =) lol. point of this whole chunk? - if things came back after separation, its meant to stay.
entered a church/ chapel and sit in for a service for the first time. though i believed its different from the normal service. hmm.. just makes me think bout the religion things going round in my head these days - the m'sia religion dispute, then some discussion bout it the other day. lol. Gab actually think of something of what I always believe in. lol. He said "If there's really a God, I believe there's only 1 of them. All the names (gods of diff. religions) were just a messenger." To me, I believe in a higher being up there... all the different religions just happen to see god in a different time, different place, in different forms. and due to the different circumstances and the different culture of ppl, the teachings somehow differs. and of course through the years, the religion leaders shaped the religion. but down to the basics, all religion teach good, provide faith and strength to one when needed, provide hope for miracles.
Being brought up in a Buddhist family, I'm actually not really being exposed much to the teachings until I grew older and read up on them myself. didn't attend spiritual classes or wad. and enjoying reading, I read bible stories, prayers etc. too. Just that I prefer the teaching of Buddhism, the work of karma etc. Don't really like how Christians praise the lord cause He's the best, live for Him, do everything for Him and those who don't believe in Him will be deny to Heaven and will live in agony. hmm.. perhaps it is just my superficial knowledge of the Christians and Catholics.
In recent years, I think I've become more religious... esp 2009. So often I pray. and i'm always thankful I'm blessed. even sometimes if I can't really see the blessing, I believed that its just not time yet.. God has better plan ahead. I'll be guide to the correct path. I'll be led to see the light eventually. and somehow, the more you pray, the more faith you have, the better things get. and believe it or not, making promises to god, keeping to them makes a difference too.. lol. I can just hear rational people explaining it that its all in the mind, its our own psychological mind at work... Well so? If believing a higher being is up there guiding me, providing me miracles when all hopes seems to be gone, give me the strength to live on, to do and achieve a better tomorrow, let me be a better a person... so be it. =)
i don't really believe in myself, i'm no great person to achieve great things, therefore i believe i do my best and god will do the rest to help me achieve wad i ought to be. somethings i can't control, sometimes i'm worried bout them but can't do anything.. therefore i believe god will help me take care of them, of things that i could not do anything about. Therefore I pray.
haha. I've written such a long entry on such a weird subject lol. and its so late into the night. i wonder tml when i read these again will i wonder what am i actually talking about... lol. one good thing having a blog that pple seldom drops by... I can crap nonsense and no worries bout it hahahaha. late night craziness. =X i shall really sleep. nitez.
oops i just realised... i'm a Buddhist using God so easily in a way refering to Buddha? issit just like how Allah was use to describe God in the M'sia Catholic news article? hopefully i've not crossed any religion lines bah... =X
hmm. right now just recieved an email.. lol. it meant nothing much to me currently. haha. 真的看开了lol. weighting them and them. They're just too dear to me.
